Fat Woman in Tight Clothes
June 4th, 2007 . by contemptster
It’s no secret that guys love big boobs… and my milkshake brings allll the boys to the yard. Of course by yard I mean me—a T&A Theme Park that takes up more land than Disney World and where the Magic Kingdom turns into a water ride if the right Prince enters.
Ooh, I’m bringing sexy back-fat back. Don’t hate ‘cause of my dangerous curves. Guys love it when I wear shirts that are way too tight. It doesn’t matter that my gut is spilling out of the bottom like some kind of saggy “Total Recall” 3rd tit. If I stick half a hot dog in my belly button it’ll look like a nipple and they can eat it afterward. Or I can. Can you size zero bitches do that?
Did I mention I have big tits? ‘Cause I do. I earned this body with a strict diet of Ring Dings and abandonment issues.
For more everyday assholes, click here.
While you’re there, reunite with Guy Who has to Point Out that You’ve put on Weight, one of our many user submissions from Crazy Carl Himself.
Contempt-o-meter
Vote here!
(1,430 votes, average: 9.9 out of 10)
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In a related Onion story, Aging Man Softens Stance On Fat Chicks:
http://www.theonion.com/content/radio_news/aging_man_softens_stance_on
Somebody voted about 300 times to put this Contemptster in the Top 5. If it was you, please come forward and explain your motivation. We’re all kind of curious.
This is a picture of beautiful woman(its the type of women I like)
And she deserves to get get 10/10 rating.
so, I vote for her.
What motivates me?, not sure, but, I like american women like her. Thats what I am looking for a nice lady similar to her(the lady in the picture)
American Dream Girl. I will keep looking until I find one and eventually marry the lucky girl.
When I see, that she gets a 10/10 then I will never ever visit this website ever again
I promise. Please know that I am good person and cause no trouble to no one. I just want her to get a 10/10 rating. What a beautiful blonde woman. I admire the lady in the above picture.
Have a nice day.
To James Bond,
From Contemptster with Love.
Oooohhh la la.
I like. (the picture)
It would nice the face of the beautiful lady
Blurry Video.
It would be nice to see the face of the beautiful lady. (typed to fast).
James Bond, you are officially a FOC (Friend of Contemptster). We wish there were more people like you. Keep up the good work and visit and vote anytime.
wow 1006 votes and still not 10/10 yet ?
How many votes will it take to reach 10/10?
Thats it, I quit.
It could be statistically impossible, but you shouldn’t give up. Did RoboCop give up? No, he didn’t. He cranked three movies out of his shotgun ravaged body, cleaned up the mean streets of Detroit, and taught all to love again. So don’t give up James.
Alright lets try this again and win the trophy for the firey hot blonde mama. Love blondes.
Have at it, Mr. Bond. But I fear you’re downfall will be none other than simple mathematics.
Contempster
I will not fall down. I hate mathematics.
ttyl.
Tony.
I thought the rating system was interpreted the other way around. For example, the more contempt you have for something, the higher the rating. james bond 9876543210 should have been voting 1’s this whole time.
Thanks for pointing out our flawed rating system Geoff. Oh, Know-It-All-Commenter is the debut Contempster of the Day tomorrow.
KIDDING!
Her bellybutton looks like an extra butt crack. Neat!
check out this fat crazy christian lady-Wow!
damn mother?!@#$%&*
eventhough i like big mamas, this one is not what i had in mind. Not all big white women fit my taste.
This one is horrible.
The bigger the better.